Monday, October 11, 2004
me, my thoughts and myself
I think I shall bore you today, with some of my true thoughts, not a little blurb, on how things are.
I am feeling rather, Melancholy, today. I guess it’s ‘cause I read a very sad book. I won’t bore you further with details. It is funny how a book can effect your mood for a day or longer…
I helped mom make scalloped potatoes today. It amazes me, but I already knew how to do it without mom’s help. I know a lot more than I would credit myself for.
I also recently read a book of a young woman, who cared more for others, than of herself. I somehow wish I could be like that.
It reminds me, there was a time I prayed for God to make me meek. And he did, just not in the way I had meant. He made me quite, and patient, slow to anger, but somehow I did not get the part that allows me to be able to stick up for myself. (That is why I stay so close to my sister. She is strong and sticks up for me. :-) ) I am a wimp.
I know though that if I pray hard enough, my meek backbone will some day be made of diamonds, to stand up for what I believe in, to reflect Gods light into the world and, to show my true inner beauty. Let the world throw their barbs, for my determination is made of my faith, grounded in Christ, the rock! And his rock is not only made of indestructible rock, but fortified by his love
Now I need to ask for integrity, to stand up for Justice and myself. I want to be a missionary. But seeing as I have not yet been given the gift of a backbone made of steel (or diamonds for that matter). It seems my destiny is here close to home. And I know that which God has planned for me is better than anything I could ever wish it to be! Even if it is, full of sadness, I know that at the end is pure and relentless joy.
Glad I could bore you for one post. Now if that wasn’t to sappy for you please leave a comment!
thea
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1 comment:
That post wasn't sappy or boring, it was quite interesting. :) There are two extremes: not enough backbone, and not flexible enough. I tend toward the "not enough backbone" side, like you say you do. I hate confronting people, even my friends! But God can make us strong when we need to be if we believe He can. King David was and is such a respected and well-known Bible character. Many people looked up to him and still do. Yet when you read Psalms, you see that the source of his strength was God. Some of the prayers he wrote sound like a child speaking to his father.
*sigh* Now to put that into practice...that's much harder.
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